“Mum, there is something I want to ask you” she said and
sat up again. I reduced the volume of the television to the
barest minimum and she held my hands
“Mum, is it bad for me to have a boyfriend at this age?” she
asked and my eyes widened in shock. I opened my mouth
to say whatever would come out but she rubbed my hands
“Just say yes or no” she said and then pursed her lips
“Erm, see dear, you know…” I stammered on and on. If I
said ‘Yes’ she would say ok but do I know what she would
go and do behind me? If I said ‘no’ then I was opening the
gate of immorality to my young girl.
These high school musicals tho! I almost lamented loudly.
I looked at my daughter’s expectant face and quickly clad a
wide smile as my heart pounded loudly.
“See my love, what is your definition of a boyfriend?” I
asked, picking my words
“Mum, ok, lemme explain to you. Someone that would
stand up to support you when everyone probably bullies you
in class; someone that would call, text and exchange gifts
with you; someone you can look at and say ‘I love you’”
My heart burst out.
I am in soup!
Had I not made a serious mistake when I enrolled my only
daughter in the school of the rich and the elites?
From where has this girl learnt all these?
My heart raced on and on but I could do nothing at that
point. Her innocent face looked on at me expecting more
soothing advice. I pulled her up to her feet and smiled at
her. I surveyed my daughter from head to toes.
She had really become grown!
She had all the curves.
She was rotund, beautiful with very long hair- her
inheritance from her Fulani father.
Her breasts were also standing hopefully on her chest. She
looked like a 15 year old!
She had almost become an obese two years ago until I
decided it was time to come back to Nigeria. The life in
France really spoilt her!
“Mum, talk now. Why are you just running your eyes over my
body like that? Are you a pervert?” she asked jokingly and I
smacked her lightly across the face. I pulled her to my laps
and placed my hand on her chest.
“My daughter already has a suitor? You want mum to be a
grandma so fast?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. She
gasped and looked into my face
“Mum, see, it’s not what you think o. I am as decent as
anything. I am even the one that tries my best to encourage
and advise my mates to desist from doing bad” she said,
so assuredly and I looked so shocked.
‘What does she know? What does my daughter know oh
Lord?’ I asked myself and she laughed.
“Mum, this one that you are looking shocked…let’s forget
about that part and please let’s go back to my question”
she said and I swallowed hard, trying really hard to conceal
my fear and shock.
“You have never told me anything about any bad thing going
on in your class Zoe!” I said passionately.
“Mummy, it’s not all the eyes see or the ears hear that the
mouth must report. That’s why we have a pair each of the
eyes and ears but one of mouth.” She preached on and
winked at me, brushing her petite finger across my nose. I
shook my head vigorously.
“No dear. I want to know everything o. Your mum isn’t a
witch. I am a presenter, I can learn from your entire gist. Do
you promise to gist me daily?” I asked and she laughed
loudly hugging me so tight
“Look for a mum that treats her daughter as a friend, listen
to her gist and still crave for more gist and I will show you
my mother.” She said as she gave me a ‘high five’
“Don’t worry mum. I will tell you later. Let’s face my own
issue now” she said almost anxiously.
“Ok boo, what exactly do you want from me?”
“Lemme be frank with you mum. You know I am the
youngest in that class and all of them know, although I am
bigger than most of them.”
“Yes daughter. I know” I said looking into her face. She
would never feel bad for her stature. In fact, she loved it! I
really taught and instilled in her boldness and confidence
plus love for oneself.
“Mum, to be frank, I have a crush in my class” she dropped
the bomb and my chest rose up with pain arising from it.
“Crush? What’s a crush?”
“Mum, it’s a Sam. He is the Class rep and I am the
assistant. He behaves matured, he is handsome, he doesn’t
do bad things, he only goes on his way and even for me, he
plays hard to get” she said and I really could not help
myself as I let out a serious sigh.
But she didn’t look at me.
“It has been like that for long until yesterday when we were
in the Biology lab when he walked over to me and dropped
a note in my hand and ran away.” She continued with
satisfaction on her face.
“Yes mum, a note. I have kept it safe in my wardrobe. It
says ‘I like your kind of girl and I won’t mind if you don’t, to
be your boyfriend’ and mum, I walked out of the lab into the
restroom to read over and over again! I could tell nobody. I
was so excited” she said, sighed and stood up from my
laps to the window side.
What should I do?
What kind of a thing is this?
What sort of a Sam has gotten the premature heart of my
What do these kids understand oh Lord!
These were the questions that ran through my head as I
looked at her. If I beat her now, of what use would that be?
If I go to their school tomorrow to report Sam to the school
authority, of what use is that?
Lord, please teach me the right step to take! I prayed as I
looked up at the ceiling as if my life depended on it.
“Daughter, tell Sam that you are inviting him for dinner in
your house on Saturday” I said and her eyes widened as she
ran to me.
“Mum! For real?” she asked, smiling widely. My heart broke
but I smiled and nodded in the affirmative.
“Yes for real. Let’s meet him and see if it’s a devil’s
proposal” I said. I didn’t know where that idea dropped
from but it dropped anyway. She stopped in her tracks, her
smile fading away.
“A devil’s proposal?” she asked and I nodded.
“Yes dearie. On many occasions, the devil proposes to us
daily. We either say yes or no to the proposal. This is a
proposal from someone, not necessarily Sam but when he
comes, by the look on his face, his word to you and all, I
will know if it’s a devil’s proposal or just a juvenile stuff” I
said and with her mouth suspended, still looking at me, I
knew she wanted more.
“See, the devil can tell you ‘hiss at your mum’. It’s just a
proposal, you either say yes or no” I explained further and
she nodded, closing her mouth.
“I understand! Like when Dad would come home and shout
at you, then you would send me inside without replying him.
You were saying ‘no’ to the devil’s proposal” she gave her
own illustration and painful as it were that my own daughter
made an illustration as this, it was the truth!
I could do nothing but nod!
“But mum, why does Dad shout at you all the time?” she
asked and as the wave of pain rose in my heart, I pulled her
close to my chest if her chubby cheeks could just calm my
“It’s just a devil’s proposal to him for which he said yes.
That’s why we have to pray for him the more so that he
would say no the proposal one day” I said and Zoe nodded
“Mum, that’s true. I just remembered something. I want to
tell you to tell Mummy Mandy to be like you” she said and I
pulled her up, looking into her face.
‘What?’ I asked
“Mandy likes a boy in my class and fortunately, it is a
mutual thing…” she kept on saying.
What is so fortunate about this whole saga girl! I fumed in
“Ok?” I replied, asking her to continue
“Mandy got home yesterday and told her mum about it.
Jesus! Mummy, if you see her face today, it was so
swollen; her mum beat hell out of her! Her mum called her
names and even dragged her by the clothes to school
today. She had even made an apron for Mandy that she
wore. She wrote ‘If you see this girl with a boy, call this
number…’ and they brought out the boy on the assembly
ground and gave him 6 strokes of the cane! All because she
is a pastor’s daughter. Ah!” she said, shaking her head.
I could understand the plight of Mrs. Otito as her first
daughter in SS 3 had reportedly been impregnated by a
teacher in her school. Little wonder she took this one
personal but she went too far!
“Mum, see, today, the boy still sent her messages of
consolation and all. Does the mum think the apron and the
lashes would stop them? That is why I love you. When one
tells you something, though it meets you in shock and you
pause like for an umpteen time, you would still come out
with happiness” she said and I smiled.
Thank God I had not failed her test if not; I would have only
lost my daughter into the hands of friends.
My phone rang from the kitchen and Zoe ran to get it!
“Mum Zack” she shouted as she ran inside the sitting room.
I had instant tummy ache at the mention of that name.
I had always hated my mother-in-law!
I pressed the receiver and placed the phone to my ears, an
intense frown on my face.
“Hello, good evening ma”
“Evening. Are you home?” she asked
“Prepare the guest room for me and also prepare pounded
yam. I am at the bus stop already”
“Bus stop!” I was saying when she dropped the call. That is
like a stone throw from my house. How did she expect me
to meet up?
“This woman sha! Must she come here! Oh God!” I almost
cried aloud, tugging at the throw pillows.
I felt Zoe’s hand on my shoulder and I looked into her face.
I had forgotten that she was there.
“Mum, it’s the devil’s proposal and you are saying yes!” she
said and I smiled and patted her head.
“Thanks for the reminder dear. Now, rush into your
bathroom, shower and read your ‘higher everyday’ I will ask
you questions on it afterwards.
“Ok mum” she said as she scurried away. I shook my head
I really do wish this was a devil’s proposal that I could
But for real, I hate my Mother-in-law with passion!
“Oh! I have forgotten to ask my daughter what bad things
she said are happening in her class!”